This is what happens when you panic and when your mind runs loose.
I found a 2nd swelling today, not sure how long it's been there, but yea, I still found it. Behind my right ear. And that's starting to unnerve me, I was trying to joke around it all night long to calm myself, but yea, leave me alone and my mind starts to wander off. Now I'm thinking all sorts of funny stuff. Want examples?
What if there's more of them?
Is it another infected lymph node?
If I have so many of them, does it mean I have cancer? *touches wood repeatedly*
I'm too young to get cancer
It doesn't help that I have started REALLY panicking for my prelims and I am bloody terrified of forgetting EVERYTHING that I have studied for. Terrified is an understatement.
So put together fear and panic and what do you get? I don't know, but I sure as hell feel like crying. My antibiotics is set to last me for the next 4 days and the vitamin C tablets and medicine for the swelling for the next 5 days. What if by the time I complete the course of the medication the lumps are still there? As big as ever? I am being extremely irrational now, but I guess I'm entitled to feel so irrational, and panicky lol. Irrational me is actually telling myself that the 2nd lump feels harder than the 1st, so yea, that doesn't help one bit.
Sigh, I gotta force myself to press on with studying. Prelims in 4 days. Life sucks. To the core.
I'm a 3rd year student in what is probably the largest autonomous university in Singapore majoring in a Science-related subject (well it sorta IS SCIENCE). I'm known to be introverted, sarcastic (at times), funny when I rant (which isn't a good thing lol) and somewhat of a loner. I miss LA and would move there in a heartbeat :(
