Lol, today was the last day of JC life, well..officially that is. And so we went to school, had a talk on exam matters, which was really... all that you can expect to find in the Instruction to Candidates booklet, which I read, purely out of boredom (lol, the things I do when I'm bored). Then off to civics we went, got our FINAL exam results for a TJ exam, and then I saw this:
Bio --> 100th percentile Econs --> 99th percentile
And in my mind, I went "What the hell?!?!?" . But oh yea, it was a good "what the hell?!?!" lol. The class lingered on further to take photos of their final day in college (Officially, AGAIN) and I spent some time running away from the cameras, succeeding a couple of times (for those of you who still don't know, I am extremely camera-phobic and I am not the least bit photogenic, so yea, you wouldn't be missing anything if I weren't in the photo, really). In the end, I took a handful of photos, will try to get it from the relevant people though. No point taking it and then not getting it, I reckon.
The farewell concert was a little boring (being kind here...). Lol. Ok, what I didn't enjoy was the citations (although the cynical and sarcastic remarks made by Mr Rajesh were very much appreciated, I love this form of humour!), the modern dance performances (it was pretty obvious that some of them forgot their steps lol), the whole I-thank-the-entire-school speeches made by students (I don't think I need to know who they thank and why, as long as they know it and the relevant people know it, I think it's really none of my business. It got to the point of being annoying having to sit through it). The tutors' performances were the better ones (surprisingly).
As I left the auditorium after the concert and was on my way to bio s (yes, how sad) where I was accosted by who else, but our ever do "dearest" GP tutor who asked me how I would rate TJC after 2 years. My response? A 4 to a 5. Out of 10. His eyes bulged. Hahaha. Yes, after 2 years, I would fail my overall experiences in TJ. He asked why, and I mentioned that I would probably rather go to VJC because the environment here just isn't suited for someone like me. I mentioned the backstabbing going around in class, which I know I didn't quite bother to watch my back, not against people like that, simply not worth my time after a while. He gave me 3 aspects to consider: academic, CCA, and social. And I told him out of the 3, the best thing to ever happen to me in TJ would be the 1st aid unit. Frustration and all, about the people never cooperating, always getting the short end of the stick, having our tutor go AWOL half the time, but at the end of the day, it was the best thing that came out of TJC. The academic aspect of it wasn't too good, but it wasn't the lowest, I said. It was the social aspect because what sickened me the most was the elitism present in TJC. I said the difference in treatment was "jarring". At the end of the day, you get sports/performing arts groups versus service groups, you get 6/7 pointers versus the other students. Elitism at its rawest form. I mentioned about the clique-ishness of the class, to which he mentioned I had my own clique, and I justified it as having know JX for 6 years, and having always been close to EH and T since the first 3 months as the reason why I somewhat identified with them. Mentioned how half the class left after 3 months and the newer half had problems integrating with the older half. Lots of factors coming into play at the end of the day. So yes, for all that TJ has been to me, I fail her. Disagree all you want, but you can't deny that TJ has her flaws, I just kept seeing it, over and over again for the past 22 months. Some people mentioned that you don't have to watch your back in TJ, but I did. Others mentioned TJ was a cosy place, some aspects of it was (Bio S classes, the 1st 3 months class), but everything else was essentially a closed up space where being different is frowned upon. Tj has problems, yes I'd give it that, but I haven't really experienced what it was good for, I thought I had it in the first 3 months, before it was all taken from me. My friends, my sense of comfort, the fun I had being in school, all gone. What keeps you going in a place would be the people. I know that. The way I feel in school changed dramatically for adversely the moment the people changed, the moment half the class changed (for the worse, something I will always maintain).
That was a lesson that was taught to me twice, that sometimes, all that keeps you going is just one plain, simple thing; the people. Last year, I hated the company I was posted to because it was nothing like what I wanted it to be, but the people there were kind, friendly and nice to me. So yes, I liked it only because of the people. You can't expect me to love the school the way I loved my primary school, because the people can't compare. They can't, they can't even touch the way I felt about my primary school friends. In primary school, people saw me for the way I am, what kind of person I am behind all the layers of fat, beyond the severely obese girl everyone saw and I still had friends, who didn't betray me, who didn't backstab me, who told me right smack, to my face, what my problem was, who would plan with me how we would cut down each other's homework load by doing half and then copying each other's work. Friends who would share a cab home with me and split the cost, male friends who would play 5 stones and zero points with the girls, friends in the media 'cause they were acting but never put on airs, friends with whom you went rafting with in camps. How do you compare? How do you compare people who backstab you because you work your butt off for good grades, who like to victimise themselves to turn others against you when you're in fact, the real victim? People who thought nothing about helping you if you were to drown? How do you compare people like that with my primary school friends? The thing is, you simply can't. You can't even compare them to people I know from my secondary school. The sense of camaraderie I experienced then is completely absent here. How do you compare? You can't. So don't come telling me I have no right to dislike TJC, because I think I do, for all I've seen from the people in the institution, I do. I've seen fewer positive things about it then I have negative, I wished the opposite were true, like in TKGS, but it isn't.
One hour.. that's how long I took to get this out. Back to studying!!
I'm a 3rd year student in what is probably the largest autonomous university in Singapore majoring in a Science-related subject (well it sorta IS SCIENCE). I'm known to be introverted, sarcastic (at times), funny when I rant (which isn't a good thing lol) and somewhat of a loner. I miss LA and would move there in a heartbeat :(
